I’m fed up! I just need to get a few things out my head. Otherwise, I would explode.
Seriously, I really thought he was gay and I still think he is gay at times. He is a smart person., a constant honor student and is now an accomplished professional. But we all think of him as gay. He is just soft in his ways.. But my crystal ball is foggy this time so I'd like to keep this "gender issue" ending with a comma, rather than a period.
In the past, he courted me. It’s not that I was spellbound or something but my world seemed to have stopped in shock. Armageddon!!! I knew my subconscious mind echoed to me “Could this be the end of the world?”. In a snap I was back into myself and realized the truth, a ROMEO is expressing his love for me. But only this time, ROMEO is GAY or likely gay! lol..
There was not a chance that we could be lovers. There was no love, no chemistry..Things just didn’t feel right. I likened it to buying lingerie. No matter how beautiful the lingerie is, but when you slip it on, it’s either too loose or too tight. Buying it is just a waste of money.
I’m talking about this thing now because he again reiterated his “love” for me a few days ago (in a jiffy) and dropped the nuclear bomb guy lingo through a cowardly text: "I am in love with you.. Am truly, madly, deeply in love with you."
He also mentioned about “first love never dies” thing. So cliché! I felt like I was opening my history book upon hearing his words. My past just got dug up and I had to re-live in it again...re-enacted the past of saying “NO” to him. I’m sure it hurt him. But the biggest issue really is not about his being gay or gay-ish. It’s more on the genuineness of the intentions. For years we haven't seen each other, and then he came up through text and told me how he much loves me.. In my book, that is so questionable. He couldn't fall in love with me again in a blink of an eye!
Oh well, I just let this roll off my shoulders, and just guess that he could be in his cups, intoxicated and all when he said those words and let karma do its thing.
Note: To the guy, if you read this, please don't get mad at me.. I'm just being true. And I will try not to talk about "love" in my next articles..hehehe..
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